Q: An Update to the Doctor
Dear Dr. Phelps,
I know I told you I quit my p-doc. I was trying to go it alone. I thought that
maybe off all meds I could "find myself" again.
The last p-doc made things worse anyways and wouldn't believe or listen to
I've been rapid cycling very badly and felt like I was getting the flu all
the time. I finally just called my MD and said I was at the end of my rope.
I'm now on Depakote, 500mg a day. I got a glimpse of what this does. One
night, after being on it for 2 days, I felt my mind calmer. The over-thinking
thing calmed down. I got very emotional. I thought is this what it's all about?
It's now day 5 on Depakote and still having rapid changes. Every day I'm
different. I know it's not just me, it's this BP, I can feel it and I feel sick
all the time. It's not the Depakote either. These flu like symptoms include the
chills and a low grade fever sometimes.
I haven't had another glimpse of that benefit again. It went away. I know
I need to get my dose up higher. I'm calling my MD Mon.
I keep feeling like this rapid cycling thing should be a concern and it
should be taken more seriously.
I asked my MD about my different pupil sizes, they are very different. He
brushed this off as genetic. There's no one in my family with this. I wonder
can't he see if there's some swelling with my optic nerves with a quick look?
I feel like either this BP can make a person pretty sick or I really have
a brain tumor.I feel embarressed but I want to push for getting an MRI.
I am also pushing to get a referral to another psychiatrist. I got a name
of one from someone I know who I found out has BP. They spoke highly of this
p-doc, so I'm aiming to see them.
I'm finally on my first mood stabilizer and feel like I'm finally
on my way to getting better. Thanks,
Dear Jen --
Glad to hear you're resolved to do this with an MD, as there really isn't any
other practical way at this point; and that you're going to try to find one you
feel comfortable working with. I'm going to defer to the doc' you
find from here, as I wouldn't want to contribute to the problem by further input
that might interfere with your working together. Good luck with
Just wanted to let you know I'm seeing a new p-doc and finally being believed
I know I wrote you alot, I was in despair at times with this. I have
BP2(probably) and rapid cycle. I have full mania on anti-depressants.
I told the docter several examples of my OCD behavior, she said it's likely that
is in this too.
I'm on Depakote, 1000mg a day now and my blood level looks good.
I felt like after giving you the "story" of everything, I wanted to
let you know the happy ending.
At the About.com forum for BP, we are all wishing you a Merry Christmas!
Dear Jen' --
That's great news; thanks for passing it along. I hope this
"better" stays for you. Thanks for the holiday wishes.
Published January, 2002